Tag Archives: Dave
It all started with a drink. Just one drink, 11 years ago, served to me by a dude with sideburns so long they almost touched under his chin.
Amish Dave they called him.
Then we ran into each other again, about 6 1/2 years ago.
(taking steps backward)
We saw each other New Year’s Eve 2008. It was awkward. We both kissed other people. But we kept bumping into each other. We went on a weekday brunch date. He let me pay for myself. He didn’t drink coffee or eat meat. I wasn’t impressed, but I offered to drive him to work… 2 blocks away. We hugged… like teenagers and grandparents in a mall. He declined a ride and walked.
And yet he called.
And here we are. 6 years later. He eats meat and drinks too much coffee. I don’t even pay for the gas in my car, but he smiles when I offer. We hug like long lost lovers. I would recognize his face even if I lost my sight. Thank the heavens for whiskey, bikes, comic books, cheap cake pans, and coffee.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Now that’s out of the way, onto our usual MM post (thankful, dwarfism, random)… Hold onto your hats. It’s gonna be a long one!
This week I am thankful for the 2 weeks Addie and I have had with Dave. Yes. TWO weeks. We left for Philadelphia on the Saturday before Christmas and we got back to RI the following one. Dave headed into work for Monday and half of Tuesday, had New Year’s Day off, then Hercules dropped some snow on us and Dave was home Thursday and Friday. As he heads into work today, I hope he feels the relief of being back to a schedule.
Since his time off I have not gotten out of bed before 9am. Most days, not before 10… and there were a few 11′s in there. True story. I ate a hot breakfast almost everyday. I showered more than twice a week. I dried my hair, by myself. I did my nails, put on a face mask or two, deep conditioned my hair, read half a book, caught up on reading some of my favorite blogs and resumed some semblance of a daily workout. This refreshing end/start to the year(s) was so important to getting my head on straight… and brings me to other things to be thankful for- like the way Dave has changed and his awesome boss.
Spending time alone with Addie when she was an infant was hard for anyone but me- her sole provider of food and the one who understood each cry and sound. Now that she’s (incredibly) vocal, understands requests and direction and eats pretty much anything that’s not nailed down, I find myself alone when Dave is home. Off on some adventure, Dave steals Addie while I sleep to make food, run errands, or read stories in her bedroom. We both give each other the eye in some strange competition of Who Will Be The One She Wants to Put Her to Sleep Tonight. When she’s hurting, Daddy can heal her pain and when she needs snuggles at night, she often begs for Daddy to rescue her from the crib. While it is nice to not have to get up at 4am, I’ve found myself pushed to the edge of the bed, sad. I miss the days she needed me so much.
Then there is the look. The look of peace and warmth. It’s what Dave’s face looks like, even at 6:30am when hungah spews over and over from the mouth of a half-awake toddler into the open space of our room. When she cries waahwaah hungah nanaaah and he hops up and asks, “you’re ready for breakfast, Bug?” There is the look of total contentment. Whatever happens to a woman to feel the love she does for her young happens to a man, too. I’ve seen it first-hand.
I’m also incredibly blessed that Dave’s boss recognized that his employees come in by train from Boston and from 50 miles away by car, and decided to cancel work before the snow hit. With a few calls and some research, Dave stayed on top of the tail-end of his work week from the safety and warmth (and yet, drafts?) of home. For a job he stumbled upon with a start-up just 3 years ago, his career is blossoming in ways we never could have foreseen.
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And so she grows. No really. I just wrote about this on a post of the same name: AND SO SHE GROWS, AND SO SHE GROWS. If you know Billy Joel, you will see my play on words from And So it Goes, and you may recognize the true heartache that comes with watching your child
grow up mature. When Addie was diagnosed, we were warned about all the things she would never do and we were told of all the milestones we would miss. We were given predictions about her height and told she had to be on a hard surface always and most toys were a no-go and her balance would be bad… and so on. And after all that, I was overwhelmed and sad. We got rid of bouncers and carriers and sleepers. I found toys that were good for her, but not always mature enough. And I didn’t know where to go. As a new mom to a special needs child, I wish I’d known all of THIS.
But I didn’t, and I wasn’t prepared for a doctor to be wrong. But she was. Not because all babies with dwarfism do walk before 36 months, although many do, or because she’s not as small as I once believed she would be, or that she has decent balance. No. I wasn’t prepared because I got lost in a negative world. I don’t always see Addie as growing up… she doesn’t always gain an up, but she does grow in her intelligence, in her beauty, in her love and understanding and in her compassion. Initially I was worried I would hinder her into a sheltered life- one where I would hide all the bad. And becoming CPL didn’t help that fear. But then I saw. I saw her say “HI!” to everyone she meets, and wave with an exuberant “BYE PEOPLE”, as we exit any given location. I have witnessed her love, as I cook dinner and she reaches around my leg with a hug and a pat and whispers love you, mama so gently into the back of my knee. She loves me, without prompting or pressure, without even seeing my face, she buries her own into my leg and expresses her own emotion.
Do I protect her? Yes. Just as I will put a helmet, and knee and elbow pads on her to ride a bike. Just as many parents do. I didn’t wear knee or elbow pads and my helmet surely did not fit as well as they do now… does that mean my parents didn’t care? Am I just over-protective? Should she never ride a bike?
I could wrack my brain forever. I could worry about all the things you might think of how I parent, or how your neighbor might feel about me, or that dude who anonymously comments on my posts in the most negative of lights. But then, I wouldn’t be parenting, I would be absorbed in my thoughts about everyone else’s thoughts. So, let’s call it a truce. Let’s make a pact.
This blog was started with the intention to education about dwarfism, but if I focus on dwarfism alone, I will alienate myself and you. I will become obsessed, immersed in so many details that I will come to define Adelaide as a person with dwarfism, and not just see her difference as a part of her. I will come to define all people with dwarfism as just that, and if I do that, I will only see myself as a white woman. That will be who I am. But it’s not. And so, this blog will continue to educate, advocate, spread awareness and push buttons. I will share stories of change and some of adversity. And here’s the best part: I don’t care what you think. While I would love your support and hope you stay to read more posts, what I crave is equality. For my child, for your child. I seek name calling, bullying and fear of the unknown to become a thing of the past. Ask questions- all of them. I want to answer. I want to know your fears so that I may assuage them. I want you to know what terms are accepted to call a person with dwarfism, and I want you to know that you do not have the right to dictate what others feel. Neither do I. On this blog, the m-word will not be tolerated, whether you’re speaking of pickles or humans or anything in between. The word? Midget. And that’s the end. Those are my feelings, on my blog that I write.
So, I won’t judge you, on your blog, should you choose to write one, and you will not judge me.
x_______________________________________________ emotionally sign here
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You’re still with me? I hope so!
I wanted to recap last year’s resolutions (only 3), which I found when I named my resolution post this year: THIS YEAR, I RESOLVE. Somehow I picked the same name, two years in a row, without trying. I guess it’s a series, now!
From last year’s POST:
1. Be nice (to me): Yeah. That. Well… I am better, and I don’t bash myself in front of Addie, ever, but recently I’ve noticed my sweet girl pointing to the scale and saying, “mama.” So, clearly, I still need to work on that. I wish I could take the scale away, but I truly believe it is useful- especially for long runs. I weigh myself before and after to make sure I am not dehydrated. I also check my weight more often than I should, but now I need to be aware of not doing this while Addie is awake. I think this is something many women need to work on, and clearly I am still trying to justify my need for a scale. Regardless, though I am nice-r to myself, in no way am I nice.
2. Know when to hold ‘em: So I still like to fight, but Dave and I are good about holding our tongues and I try to not speak to him in sarcastic tones because I truly do not want Addie to pick that nasty habit up! This is something I am still working on, but I think I will always have to be conscious of my words and actions as I’m a bit of a sailor-mouth with a temper.
3. Earn it to own it: Nailed it! I took time for myself each day to write and came up with 269 posts last year. This year I aim to write posts with just as much heart as ever… and add some time to take care of my fitness goals, too!
So there it is… Monday! I hope you have a beautiful week, Reader!!
So here we are- the first Monday in December. After four days with Dave not working, I am saddened to be back to my usual routine (but also a bit relieved)- and looking forward to finishing our holiday decorations, completing craft projects and patiently awaiting the first real snow fall. BUT, before I jump into December, I want to give thanks for two very important things in my life that have defined the woman I am today (a little diversion from my usual MM posts, but bear with me).
I am thankful to be here. I am thankful that my Mom and Dad worked so hard for me- that they pushed to give me the best education and that my Mom battled my years of depression by my side. That all the nights I was up, numbed from the inside out and unable to sleep, she was up too. Feeling every bit of pain I was trying to get out. I am thankful that my Mom is perfect. She’s not God (at least I don’t think so), but she is perfect for me, and here is my proof that she’s done at least a dozen things right in life (in no particular order):
1. Addie, Mark and “Maverick”
2. Jessica (Worth) Schmidt
3. Nick Worth
4. Geoff Worth
6. Jonathan Worth
7. Mark Worth
8. Alfred LaManna
9. Her own private practice
10. My childhood home
11. Her children have men and women who love them dearly.
12. We can all live on our own even if we choose not to (yep… you made it, Ma!)
Of course she’s done countless things that have kept us safe, happy, fed (and over-fed), well dressed, teeming with smiles, boiled over with tears, on the best teams, at the schools we chose, in the cars we wanted… but more than that- none of us (us being anyone in her life) has ever been thought of behind herself. She’s not the Savior, or a Saint, but she selfless, incredibly loving and one of the most determined women in the world. My favorite Mom Facts:
* I honestly cannot remember one time that my mother complained about her body- and she still doesn’t- she is my best role model for how to love myself. I can remember seeing her c-section scar as a child. She would say, “isn’t it beautiful?”
* She’s incredibly strong, emotionally and physically- having a VBAC birth with me in ’84 being one of the most physically powerful things a woman can do! Sadly, she’s also had to be the rock for our family. Holding us all together after my brother’s passing, her own father and my Dad’s deaths and a few other Earth shattering experiences and losses. While we all needed the hugs she was giving, I still wonder who was holding her when she needed it the most.
* She had children in three different decades!
* She asked my Dad out first… they met, engaged, and married in less than 6 months, fought for their marriage and survived a lot together- always together. I know that a marriage is work- some of the best, most rewarding and painful and taxing work two people can endure. I also know it is worth every minute, from the happiest to the saddest of tears.
* She ran for office as a democrat in a republican community and had a lot of support. She also never said a negative word about anyone, and always had a smile. She still does, as she plans and participates in community clean ups and fights to preserve historic parts of Upper Moreland (PA).
* She gets involved in what her kids hold dear to them and makes it dear to herself- even in our adulthood. She gave Addie her first year of LPA membership before we were even home from the hospital after her diagnosis. She’s learned to Skype to keep us all as close as she can. She leads an AL-ANON group and is always there for members who need support.
* She never forgets to forgive.
Another thing I’m thankful for is my dear husband, Dave. Every now and then I see him grow as a parent right before my eyes. He comes out of his shell and transforms into Super Man, reminding my subconscious why I knew he was the one for me. This past weekend was a true reminder.
Before I jump into this, Dave is like many fathers out there: He was excited for his first child, doing all he could to ready the house, make sure I had all the strange foods I wanted and held me up during my 36 hours of labor. He didn’t paint my toenails or offer me some fancy “you did it!” jewelry, but he was the best gift of all: There. After Addie was born he did everything he could do, helping me prep myself for late feedings, cleaned my pump and all the dishes, and he took over diaper duty (no pun intended) on more than one night… but he wasn’t always sure how to interact with her and that made me nervous. Would they ever have a relationship?
Soon, they got close- Addie learned “dada” first and would often ask for him. He began to be the only one to get up in the middle of the night and they started a breakfast routine of just the two of them every day.
Then Friday night happened. At around 3am there was a cry, loud and clear. “WAAAHWAAAAH!” she belted from her half-slumber. Dave sprinted from his sleep down the stairs, filling her water bottle and rushing it back to her. I opened one eye and glanced at the monitor. I could hear her chugging as Dave cooed to her and tucked a wild curl behind her ear. Out of breath, she handed the bottle back to him, fell back onto her pillow and popped up to her feet almost as fast. “Up!” she demanded. Feeling the heat coming from her face, he lifted her from her bed and carried her into our bedroom.
The next few hours were a blur. She was up and down with a fever of 100.7 and her bulging gums the culprit. More requests of water and rolls all over the bed kept him up for hours, but he never once asked for help and encouraged me to get some sleep. At one point, when I felt her stop moving, I myself rolled over to see her diaper clad body hugged closely into Dave. Her nest of hair battling the edges of my pillow as they shared one of his, both of them more peaceful than sleeping angels.
At 9:30am I woke up to the smell of coffee, lively chatter about nanas and mamas and dadas and puppies and a few “no-s”. A breakfast of fresh cranberries and white chocolate pancakes, in the shape of Christmas trees and snowflakes, topped with powdered sugar, with bacon and two eggs was delivered to me in bed by a happy lady and smiling daddy.
Oddly, this isn’t the first night of teething that Dave has battled himself. Most nights she does awake, he takes over, going into Dad Survival Mode and making sure she is dry, watered and fed before starting the coos, rocking and often needed snuggles. He takes pride in providing for us, but he also loves taking care of us, nurturing his ladies with cuddles (Addie) and coffee (me) and delicious breakfast for all. I may not get fancy jewels or trips to Paradise, but I get adored and cared for and thought of at all hours of the day (even ones where thought seems impossible). And for that, I am thankful.
Of course Addie has made me a Mom and my in-laws have given me support and courage, my friends have been the rocks I’ve so needed in life to anchor me to something better than myself and my family the ties that bind who I am as a person… but I am newly defined since marriage. I am ever-changing and have a support system that does not abandon me with time and difference, but learns and grows with me. This first year of Marvelous Mondays is coming to a close and I embark on a new year, and new challenges with all the promise and hope of a child wishing on a star and the determination of a champion.
I’m thankful you stuck with me through all of these Mondays, Reader. Thank you.
This weekend was a blast!!!!!
I am SO thankful for my inlaws and their never-ending patience! Living on a street that is great for yardsales, my mother-in-law and I decided to unload our stuff before the Winter… pulling Dave and my father-in-law in on it. With lots of planning, searching, basement cleaning and organizing, all of our items were in the driveway by 7am on Saturday. The cold morning was replaced with sunshine and laughter, as my my in-laws and I hung out. Yep. Like we went way back. Like they were my own parents, or that they had known me forever. It was awesome.
Eventually Dave and Addie came (the babe sleeps til 9:30 most days), and Gramma went to be Gramma and Grandpa played with the cousins. But those few hours were awesome! We had a decent day, so right before breakdown we decided to set it up again the next day. Our haul? Less than $20, but again… just the three of us hung out over chilling coffee, a nap in the driveway (yep, me), homemade breakfast sandwiches on my FIL’s freshly baked bread (SO good!) and talks of $25 tea sets. It was an awesome weekend (except for the Philadelphia Eagles’ loss), and I hope that we keep up the [new] tradition of the family yardsale!
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This week I just want to celebrate! I got the proclamation declaring October Dwarfism Awareness Month! I shared THIS post with the wording… check it out! Let’s get all of our states to make the same declaration!
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Lastly (like how short this one is this week? …don’t get used to it!): My random of the week is don’t give up. When Addie was first born, there was an instant connection with us. More than love- a lifeline- before she was born, I was, in fact, her lifeline. Watching Dave as a new dad wasn’t like the movies. He was tentative, but not nervous. He was in love, so in love… but I was scared that same connection I felt wasn’t there. Fast forward to our toddler. The one who is scooped up by Daddy and flown out the front door in sheer excitement to share the full moon with his girl. The one who has breakfast dates with Daddy, sans Mommy (who is delivered her coffee in bed). The girl who loves for Daddy to read books but screams for Mommy to put her to sleep… the slight watering of Dave’s eyes as he passes her off to me. The girl who runs after her Daddy (and puppy), but never has to ask him to wait- he’s already running back to her. The bond is there. It was there all along. I didn’t see it because I was blinded by hours of nursing and pumping, baby food making, diapers, doctors’ appointments and one class or another. But when I stopped and observed I saw it. I’m glad I didn’t give up on him. I knew he was the perfect man (for me) and would be the best father (for our child…ren?).
Happy Monday, Reader! May you find new appreciation, empowerment and connectivity.
I had to mention this because we are moms. I mean I’m sure we aren’t all moms… but we are all parents, or could be, or will be. Or friends to those that are. Or whatever. We all need some damn privacy, regardless!
So, when I read THIS blog post the other day, I literally LOL’d. It actually made me think of a comment my husband made to me the other day (sorry to unleash your secrets, hunnie), “I peed sitting.”
I turned my head, wide-eyed. “I’m sorry?”
It went like this: Addie didn’t want to be alone, and she looked like she was moving towards the toilet. He tried to stop her and move her back towards the sink, but she didn’t want that. When he tried to leave her in her room, she screamed. He didn’t want to disturb my nap (YAY, A NAP!), so he brought her back in the bathroom… afraid that any other way would leave her scarred, splashed or otherwise compromise his parenthood, he sat.
Between the blog and Dave, all I can think is this is a phase. Most of the time Addie likes to brush her teeth while I take a moment to myself (heaven forbid she not be with me in the bathroom- although she plays alone when I’m folding laundry), but there are times she wants to be held. “UPPAH!” she shouts as I deftly pee and jump up as quick as possible. I really try to remember this is all a phase, like the one where I would nurse her, while I was peeing because she was attached to me and she would pull off and cry (perhaps my milk would let down when I FINALLY peed) and I would be there, also crying, “I’m so sorry baby, mommy just needed to pee,” while my bathroom window was curtained, but wide open. My poor neighbors.
I know times will change. In 17 years I will be alone again… except Dave will burst in needing to brush his dentures or quickly shave his sideburns. “You don’t mind, do you? The door wasn’t totally shut.”
Until my family bathroom time is up, there will be games and rewards for bathroom behavior. Tears shed over the one time I locked the door. Makeup applied in the mirror I so carefully clean each morning and more toothpaste spread across my sink than my pittance of a blogger salary can afford. I will cherish these times, for each thing is but a phase and each phase will have an end. The day will not come any different, or announce its change. It will just be. The end will come and I won’t ever know that it is.
I will miss the tiny fingers reaching under the door, the challenge of buttoning my jeans with one hand and the mechanics of opening mascara with my teeth. I know I will miss these things, even when I say I hate them because I always say it with a smile. Here’s to the phases, the beginnings and the endings, everything in between… and the alone time we so wish for.
There are weekends that leave you totally drained… this was one of them for me. Some of it was just life coming to a breaking point (I’ll call this drama) and the other part was a migraine. If you remember anything about Dave’s migraines, they are intense, severe and scary. THIS post will remind you. Thankfully Dave caught it in time and took something before it was full-blown. He is still a bit woozy, but no actual migraine. WIN! Beyond that, I am SO ready to kick this Monday off! I have yoga tonight at the YMCA, New Mom’s Group this afternoon and lots of laundry to keep me company in between…
This week I am thankful for silver linings. When B Sharp closed, I was sad to lose a part of our lives that had always been. There was never a time that I knew Dave that he wasn’t Dave from B Sharp. Now I know him as Dave the cyclist, Dave the husband, Dave the Dad… but there will always be Dave from B Sharp in my heart. This weekend was the first one where we spent one whole day together- Dave only worked when Addie napped and I needed to get work done myself. If I was ready to go, so was Dave. I was left to my own devices (to run an errand and meet my friends’ new puppy with Addie) for a few hours while Dave slept off the migraine issue mentioned above. This time was more precious than our wedding day. Seriously.
We held hands, we kissed after dinner, we laughed about Addie covered in chili. We shared moments as a family I’d been missing since Addie was born. Moments we didn’t have because the only time Dave ever takes off work is FOR something. It’s so nice to have an unplanned day- even if we have plans to do something. No wedding, funeral, BBQ, or doctor’s appointment was going to dictate our time. We spent the morning eating breakfast in bed (thanks, Dave and Addie!) and then slowly preparing for an outing to explore Warren, RI.
Spending the afternoon meandering through homes built in the late 1800′s, we grabbed a quick lunch and then headed to Imagine Gift Store. This store was AWESOME in so many ways- from the moment you walk in you think that you’re in a kitschy shop. As you walk through the cows and Red Sox paraphernalia, you’re brought into a small candy shoppe and then into some awesome New England craft-style things. From spices to nautical themed cheese plates. Keep going to find beach house décor and those silly gifts for someone who has everything. Go upstairs and it continues- THESE are something I hope to get for Mother’s Day! There is a whole kids’ section- complete with newborn attire and toddler books. Then the kitchen area… where I saw the first thing I will buy when we have a big kitchen with a six burner range. THIS honey dipper! I love honey, single brew pots and personal touches. This store was meant for me, American Express and someone with much deeper pockets. Going to Warren to play in the Pirate Park and enjoy a great afternoon window shopping was perfect for us.
…but let’s not think I didn’t get a treat. For less than the price of a good bloody mary, I got this mix. It is SO good… and could actually be heated for a bowl of soup- It’s so rich and perfect. Just add vodka!
Even Dave enjoyed a small glass while he washed dishes… yep, this happened:
So yeah… I am thankful for silver linings.
For dwarfism this week, I want to mention my amazing district, District 1!!! We have some awesome bags and bracelets that we sell (check it out HERE) and almost everywhere I go people ask me where I got such a big re-useable bag, or what my green band means. I wanted to let you know that you can get these for yourself while giving support to people like me who can’t always afford the cost of getting to, staying at and getting home from district events, as well as helping to offset expenses to our community to host events. These get-togethers often include speakers, doctors and been-there-done-that families who offer so much support, comfort, experience and love to newbies like our family. Wondering what these items are…
Lastly, my random of the week is really a plug for myself. I have a new project underway… something to help me cope with my food addiction (I miss being in the kitchen ’til 2am, like I was in my previous life)… It’s called Carpenter in the Kitchen and it’s a collaboration between myself and my father-in-law. You can also check us out on Facebook. I hope you have some time to check it out, share it, follow it or check in from time-to-time to see what new goodies there are for you to try!
Have a wonderful week, Reader! Happy Monday to you!
It’s summer- AMEN! The sun, beach, pool, water, heatwaves, sun, sun, sun.
Besides vitamin D, the sun also provides us with warmth, happy feelings and lots of memories of days spent out-of-doors. All of those memories, we hope, are not tainted with the dreaded BURN!
I am always very careful… then sometimes I’m not. Sadly, there are moments that I just miss parts and end up with the same result: burn. It’s embarrassing for me, as I come from a family afflicted with cancer (not necessarily skin), and do not want to increase my risk or exposure to carcinogens, but sometimes I find myself here:
I began to think… this is common for many people. Because of the pain it causes NOW and the pain it could cause in the future (in the form of a life threatening illness), I hope to share my secrets about how I protect myself year ’round.
1. We all like to lay out in the sun… I even flip like a pancake I also remember to wear sunglasses whenever I’m out in the sun (Dave and Addie, too!).
2. Make it your routine. I keep my sunscreen everywhere and add it to products, too! When I apply foundation, I put a dollop of Clinique SPF 30 in my palm as well- or just use Cityblock (the expense is worth it for my face!). I do this everyday, keeping the bottle in my makeup bag to ensure its use. I also add some CVS brand to my hand and body lotion, especially in the summer- always making sure to apply it to my neck and chest. The thinnest skin (and often the first to wrinkle) is on the chest and neck: let’s protect it!! There is a bottle in my diaper bag- for me and Babyganics for Addie- and I try to keep the sunscreen away the elements (freezing and heating to the point of melting both lesson the effectiveness of SPF). There is a bottle of the spray kind to whip around myself before a run in the sun (or to reach my back when no one else is around to help) right near my fuel belt!
3. When dressing baby, add SPF to the scene! I make sure to put sunscreen on Addie before I dress her in the morning, to give her a base protection. I always add more if we are outside for extended periods of time, but I don’t worry if we take a short walk around the block- because I know there is some protection there! Remember that your babes are getting sun through the windows, just like you- a good base of SPF will help protect them on long drives.
4. Offer to help! Dave forgets his ears, head and tops of his feet- Those are the hot spots. Literally. I always give him a reminder and then attack him with a handful of lotion on his back and shoulders (as to not repeat his severe Ocean City, NJ burn of 2010, as seen above!):
The easiest tip is sunglasses… they’re fashionable, and prevent eye damage and premature wrinkling, not to mention blind spots while driving. It’s not easy, but to add sunscreen to your daily routine can make a difference to the number of years you have to enjoy these long summer days and nights filled with good friends, family and food. Go, right now, and add SPF to the lotions you use everyday- it’s a start, and a start is somewhere!
I wish you a happy, healthy and burn-free summer!
I wrote about BSharp before, but THESE were not my only thoughts. It’s not often I feel the need to branch away from Addie on this blog, but today I must. I must focus on the man who made it possible.
After 10 years, Dave is shutting the doors to a business he built from the bottom floor. Of course he has business partners, but the dedicated man who gave seven days a week to the shop, then hours spent at home planning how to build it, grow it and nurture it, all those times he wanted to close before but gave it one more (and then another…) go. That is Dave.
He did not let go of a sinking ship, just finally realized that he had to dock the boat before running aground (can you tell it’s summer and I love boats?). This is what brings me such comfort. I don’t have it in me to recognize when to let things be. My whole life I have struggled with saying goodbye, closing doors and moving on. Dave has taught me that it’s OK to do these things. It’s not all about making everything work- that is not success. He’s shown me that sometimes success is simply not failing.
After 10 years of quality business and hundreds of broken hearts at the news of closing, success is apparent. It’s not in the measure of money or the fame or notoriety, it’s in the community of love and support that surrounds BSharp.
I am proud to be your wife, the mother of your daughter and to have been the one that you chose to fight for, for better and worse.
I wish I could hire a skywriter to announce how much I love you and how blessed Addie and I are to have you and your perseverance. You teach us to keep going, and to create new paths when the old are worn.
Here’s to ten years.
Thank you for bringing me back from this and building these walls around me <3
I think I should just rename Dave’s business trips as Disaster Weeks.
Something(s) always happens.
My cell phone miraculously died
Addie got her first stomach bug
…and the night he got back, half of my tooth fell out.
Because I love to celebrate, let me first wish my bestie, Ashley, a happy 25th birthday. As she gets up there in age (NOT), she also gets more and more beautiful. I am so lucky to know her and to have declared her as my sister <3
My step-dad, Al, is also celebrating his birthday today! Happy birthday, Daddy Al! We love you and can’t wait to see you in a few weeks to celebrate “your” Bambino’s first birthday!
And so, we move on… but not before one of my favorite photos, of course!
As I stated, when Dave leaves it seems like everything falls apart! For some reason, my newly replaced cell phone had a screen connection problem, out of the blue, that happened Monday night. Really… it was working, and I left it on my desk as I cleaned up the living room. Then I went to check the time, and the screen was black with stripes on it- almost like a bar code.
I couldn’t sleep for fear that Addie would have a problem in the middle of the night, so I had time to write an obituary for my phone:
Last night, HTC Incredible died from an unknown complication of being an older android cellular device.
He will be (un)fondly remembered as fritz-y, spotty, unable to commit to being on (or off), having memory confusion and being, in general, noisy for no notification reasons.
He is survived by the HTC Incredible 2, which not only has a bigger screen, but a better rear camera and a new feature upgrade of the front camera, as well. (Perfect for mom + baby selfies) Two will carry on the SD card of Incredible with many wonderful memories, and a great hope and expectation that the new platform has better performance capabilities.
HTC Incredible was buried at the Asurion Headquarters on March 26, 2013. In lieu of flowers, the Incredible family requests you give all other android phones a chance before purchasing the iPhone or one of the 5 family members, who all seem to have mostly the same features, but go up in price.
Because the last time Dave left we ended up at the doctor 3 times in 2 days, I was terrified to not have a phone- so I packed Addie into the car at 7:30pm and headed to the Verizon store. The gentleman who helped me was wonderful and my new phone was at my house the next day at 10am (and it was the upgraded version!). So… perfect! All is well in the world, right?
After a wonderful play date on Tuesday, a much needed event for us ladies, Addie woke up Wednesday morning sleeping in vomit. She took a bath and seemed fine, so I gave her a banana and my milk. Her usual breakfast. She seemed fussy, though (very unlike her) and kept raising her arms to be picked up. After picking her up, she promptly dropped her head onto my chest and fell asleep. Not 3 minutes later she picked her head up and threw up all over me. I let her finish and sat her next to me, thankful that she had only gotten Dave’s big, fluffy robe that I was wearing, and her own pick ensemble… but then it came again. In waves, my poor girl was getting sick all over herself and the bed beneath her. I didn’t know what to do except let her finish. Throughout it she kept looking at me trying to smile, as though she was apologizing.
I called the doctor. “A stomach bug is going around,” the nurse told me. She gave me guidelines for Pedialyte and told me to call again if there was a high fever or ear ache involved. I hung up feeling helpless and dirty. I could not remember the last time I’d showered and I was already through two outfits.
I learned a valuable lesson that I’d like to share with all parents out there! Put a plastic sheet on your bed.
Before Addie was born, I knew I wanted to do as much skin-to-skin time as possible, so we put a plastic sheet on under the mattress cover to be prepared.In the first few weeks of Addie’s life, she would sleep on my chest, no diaper and we would stay like that for hours. Most of the time, the towel under me was enough, but sometimes, the sheets took a hit. No problem.
With Addie’s illness, we changed the sheets 3 times (I did 11 loads of laundry in 2 days- Thanks Woolzies for making it easier!). You know your child is ill when your bedding comes from all three different sets (one sage green, one cranberry red and the other a grey green)… topped by your shades-of-purple suede comforter. During this mess, I also learned the putting a plastic sheet, cover mattress and fitted sheet on (TIMES TWO) will save you in the case of accidents in the baby’s crib! Just peel off the top layer of mess and done!
With Pedialyte, nursing and LOTS of cuddles, Addie was feeling better and was smiling ear-to-ear when Dave got home later that night:
Finally! Dave was home! I was SO going to take a shower… but only after we ate. As I bit into my food, I felt something hard. Ew. There was some bone in my chicken!
Then I ran my tongue over my back teeth.
There was a hole.
A little back story here: I grind my teeth. I have forever. I blame my parents. Not only do I grind in my sleep, sometimes so loud it wakes Dave up, l but I catch myself grinding my front and back teeth during the day, too. I have woken up with a headache everyday for over 2 months… this is nothing new. I went almost 8 months a few years ago. Stress makes it worse, which I’ve been under a lot (see: CPL), but it’s just a part of me. Even when I’m happy, I grind.
Freaked out and ashamed of my oral health, I called my Mom, posted on FB to find a dentist, and got in the shower to finally clean my hair! Dave peeked past the curtain, “make an appointment tomorrow, I’ll take care of it.” If there had been more hot water, I would have sat down and cried. I was so tired and my tooth hurt. Why does this stuff have to keep happening? was all I could think.
I got a referral from my awesome friend (and amazing stylist) Sara, who directed me to Page Family Dentistry on the East Side of Providence. I was warned that they’re not warm and fuzzy, but they know their stuff. I looked them up and wrote the number down- prepared to call in the morning. When I reached them at 8:30 they had TWO appointments for me to choose from the SAME DAY! Because they didn’t have a sliding scale, I was timid, but when I ate my yogurt, a blueberry went into the back of my mouth and I was stung with the worst pain. “3:45,” I blurted.
Addie was asleep when I parked, but as I lifted her car seat I saw her eyes flutter. Shoot. No nap meant she might become a mess at some point. Onward we went! As I approached the door I saw a sign. Of course I saw a literal sign, but a sign too.
Dr. Marc Page and Dr. Lawrence Page.
My Dad’s name was Mark Laurence. Woah. I know, I’m reading a lot into it, but I knew that I’d found my dentist. Plus, as I was leaving, Dr. Page (not sure who is who… I don’t think I was introduced to the guy who bonded my tooth YIKES!) walked past and I saw his jacket said DVC with a ram on it. “Is that from Del Val?” He looked at me. “The Aggies,” I said, “I’m from Pennsylvania.” “Nobody ever knows that,” he said back. We had a brief conversation. Life comes full circle.
The hygienists were all nice and they loved Addie… who was smiley (of course) and happy the whole time. Even without a nap, she was my little peach as usual. Like I said… I’m not sure who is who, but the man who I saw was amazing. He knew I had no insurance so he bonded the tooth (it looks and feels great!) instead of pushing me to get the (much needed at $950!) crown. He seemed impressed that my 13 year old night guard still fit and offered to trim it for me if I brought it in Monday morning (he’d have it back by 5pm).
He welcomed me to make another appointment, AND took a look at my last tooth- reassuring me it’s NOT a cavity. Like I said, I grind. My top teeth have actually ground a hole into the tooth. Dr. Page checked my bite and ground down some of the sharp tooth up top for me. And encouraged me to wear my night guard as much as possible.
Basically, I need a lot of basic dental care, which I knew (nothing major- but a lot of it) and is one of the reasons- besides money- that I have avoided the dentist. I have to say, while no one at this office seems like a “hugger” to me, I was not judged or made to feel badly about my lack of dental care. I was warned that the bonding may not last, but that it was better than being in pain and the woman who does all the billing gave me lots of information about individual plans that I could look at for care. I noticed all dental insurance is incredibly expensive, requires a year of payment before any major work can be done and if you do the math and only need a few things it’s cheaper to just pay out-0f-pocket, BUT I really appreciated the time the woman took to explain it to me AND give me information for me to review.
If you’re looking for a dentist: PLEASE check out Page Family Dentistry- you won’t regret it!