So, It’s been QUITE the weekend. I think I am stressed for the next two weeks before they even happen. Don’t you hate when you do that to yourself?! I am combining MM with Mom Before Mom because… well, sometimes life just all comes together in sweet harmony. Read on!
This week I am thankful for my beautiful girl and her power of healing. We had a wonderful visit with the ENT two weeks ago to check on her tubes and they’re doing great! She seems like she is hearing SO much better, but I will have more conclusive, scientific results after our audiology appointment in May. Until then, we are back in the water and loving out new ear plugs- they’re even fun to try and eat!
Which brings me to the Mom Before Mom prompt from All of me Now this week: What was the first piece of music you couldn’t stop listening to? What was the first piece of music you bought?
I am so glad that Addie can hear! I can say that I remember driving my sister crazy when I was about 15, listening to Dave Matthew’s Band over and over- more specifically, Every dog has it’s day every day has it’s way of being forgotten- “Mom it’s my birthday.” What would you say?, and then restarting the song. Ah, the joys of newly made compact discs.
But my first favorite memories of music are the nights after Flyers’ games, when I was half asleep in the back of the car and my Dad put on Oldies 98fm Philadelphia for Doo Wop Sundays. As I drifted off to sleep, knowing that I would wake up in the morning safe in my bed, I listed to some amazing songs like Earth Angel, In the Still of the Night, Sixteen Candles, I Only Have Eyes for You, Why do Fools Fall in Love, A Teenager in Love, Pretty Little Angel Eyes, Life is But a Dream, Blue Moon, Tears on my Pillow, Sunday Kind of Love, Since I Don’t Have You, and my all-time favorite Unchained Melody. These songs all bring me back to a time where I knew (almost) nothing bad in this world existed. Where all evils could be cured by a hug from my Dad.
I want this for Addie. I am thankful that Dave and I can give her the gift of music, and that Dr. G was able to give her (back) the miracle that is hearing. Dave is a very talented musician and he needs to share that with her. I want to give my little angel all the happy memories and related history that comes along with different musical eras. To cherish memories that were both mine as a child, and my Dad’s (him being young in the 50’s and growing up with this music), gives me the “old soul” I’m said to possess. Passing on my love of music is something I am proud to give to Addie and cannot wait to share with her more and more as she grows into her likes and dislikes… or maybe I can wait- if it means NOT having to listen to the same Sesame Street song over and over and over!
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This week, in light of Easter, I’d love to focus my information about dwarfism to weight. Addie had a beautiful Easter shoot last weekend, as a model for one of my wonderful friends, Lynette, owner of Exalt Photography.
Yesterday was Easter and we had a beautiful time as a family! We went to Home Depot, snuggled in, boiled eggs we never dyed, and had a wonderful dinner at my bestie’s house… we also had an Easter basket!
… with no candy or food of any kind involved. Someone made a point of emailing me to tell me that I shouldn’t feel superior just because I don’t give Addie sweets or candy because she’s young and I will someday. My response, quite simply, is OK. I don’t feel superior to anyone for any reason. The feeling that you need to email me to tell me that giving Addie candy and sweets is in some way inevitable is a given, makes me wonder why you are so passionate about this issue. She will have these things, but they do not have to come from our home. In no way does that ever need to happen. Will it? Sure. But I have made a parenting decision- equally with Dave- that sweets and treats will not be a part of our holidays. Instead, we choose books. Addie has gotten a special book for each holiday thus far. Perhaps she will get a special DVD one year, or a specific outfit. But, there are so many opportunities for junk outside the home, there is no need for me to spend my money supplying such things. It is not a judgement on what others do… it is just our prerogative.
With that being said: lots of other children do not have the automatic predisposition to obesity. Not being overweight. Obesity. I am a healhty person by nature. I like salad, I enjoy running and I come from a family of athletic people. While Addie is partly my genetic make-up, she is also Dave’s, who comes from a less athletic family. And she’s also something completely different from us. She is her! Children with achondroplasia have a high-risk for weight issues. I’ve been on a few sites in the last 10 months that have parents asking for dietary tips for their achondroplastic children… their 4 to 7 year olds, who are being placed on dietary restrictions because of their weight. That is terrifying to me. In a world where primary concerns are looks and weight, especially for girls, I am concerned for Addie. I want to give her the right foods now to avoid the issue of childhood dieting (which can have terrible emotional consequences, and often times don’t last) later. If Addie doesn’t have fast food (which Dave and I do not ever eat. Ever.), juices (they’re all sugar) or cake and candy, I won’t be setting her up for failure. Just a bite here and there at home, as regulated as they are, do not account for what she will encounter outside the home. Just a few extra pounds on her will effect her hips (she has dysplasia), knees and ankles, not to mention her spine- in-which she has some minor issues now.
It may seem like we are “hippy-dippy” (as I was recently called and chuckled about) because we have no TV, we don’t ever go through a drive-thru and I refuse to give Addie junk food (she snacks on peas- and rarely her auntie gives her puffed cereal), but I’m truthfully just trying to give her the best start to life as I can. How many play dates will be spent playing a video game or watching a movie (she still has never watched a movie)? How many parents will grab chicken fingers from BK for dinner when Addie gets a ride home? How many birthday parties will have pizza, cake and ice cream? A lot. I want Addie to learn about wonderful raw foods, foods cooked with love and care- prepared with whole ingredients that she can identify and learn to use in her own ways. I want Addie to learn how to play outside in the hot Summer sun, the warm Spring air, the brisk chill and leaves of Fall, and the snowy days in a New England Winter. I want her to like to dance in the rain, the way I do. There wasn’t a reason to be inside (except for lightening and thunder) as a child, and for that reason I am an active, healthy adult.
I guess as crazy as I seem, I am not trying to restrict her from ever having certain foods or watching TV, but I make the conscious decision to not have them in my home (for my sake as much as her’s), and to not spend my money on them. What other people do and all the elements of the world… they’re not something I can control. Addie will make decisions for herself as she gets older, and I will make those decisions for her now, as other parents do for their children. Sometimes Addie will be in the crosshairs of our family values and others. That’s OK! That’s growing up and becoming your own person- acceptance, respect and, at minimum, tolerance of other values are wonderful life lessons. I never ate Big Macs and therefore I never want one. I don’t battle with weight or weight-related illness. It’s just that simple. Many things in Addie’s life are bound to be struggles. With a healthy lifestyle, weight doesn’t have to be one of them.
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My random of the week (of which there are two) is a BIG Happy Birthday to my amazing hubby Dave and his business partners Domenick and Jamez. Their business BSharp has been open for TEN YEARS!!!!! It may not be what keeps us afloat anymore, but it is an accomplishment to keep a business alive for 10 years, especially in this economy, especially in Rhode Island. Just ask Curtis Montague Schilling, also known as Curt, who couldn’t make a business work with 75 million dollars. I digress. Happy birthday, BSharp! I love you, Dave. I am so proud to be the wife of such an amazing, dedicated man. Working two jobs to keep your ladies together means more to both of us than we could ever tell you <3
Second… IF YOU HAVE DRESSES YOU WANT TO RID YOURSELF OF AND ARE IN THE AREA…
It’s back – Say Yes to the Prom Dress! The Pawtucket Community Partnership Team Against Violence are looking for donations of gently used prom dresses! Make arrangements to drop off your clean and generous donations to make a teen’s DREAM COME TRUE by calling us at (401) 723-3057 by April 12th.
We will pick dresses up from you and make the delivery! It’s so easy to help!
Have a fantastic week, Reader!!!
melissa weintraub (@dentistmel) says
What a weekend!! Addie is so lucky to have a mommy like you! You are such a caring and thoughtful person and a true role model for her! The love of music is so important. I am so glad she could hear all the beautiful sounds. Happy Easter little one.
Susan Worth-LaManna says
Thank you, Chel, for that ride down memory lane…I can sing everyone of those 98.1 songs you cited. Addie is so blessed to have music in her life!
Susan Worth-LaManna says
Thank you, Chel, for that ride down memory lane…I can sing everyone of those 98.1 songs you cited. Addie is so blessed to have music in her life! It does provide a medium for pleasure, for learning and for wonderful memories.
Sharon - MomGenerations.com says
Your posts are always, for me, like listening to stream-of-consciousness wisdom. Thank you for making my Monday a bit more marvelous!
Joanna {Baby Gators Den} says
I love your posts!! I’m so glad your sweet Addie has the gift of music. It sounds like you are quite the musical family, also congrats on your husband’s business anniversary!
Born Ready Baby says
Can I just say something that is already quite obvious? Ok, thanks. It’s that… people send you the most ridiculous emails!!! They have too much time on their hands! In a way, it shows that many people read your blog… but the emails they send are super unnecessary.
Kristin Wheeler (@MamaLuvsBooks) says
So much going on!!! Awesome! And I love that basket with her name on that!!! So pretty!!! Congrats to your hubby!
Joy S says
Please stick to your guns as far as the sweets. When my now 19 year old son was born I said I’d avoid giving him sweets as long as I could. I ended up giving in to my in-laws’ pressure and gave him sweets. He never developed a weight problem but his younger sisters have. He developed the most cavities I think I’ve ever seen in one doctor visit.
Also give your daughter a wide variety of foods all the time. My kids have very eclectic tastes because we’d manage to give them unusual foods at just the right time. They love raw veggies but won’t eat cooked veggies. They are now all teenagers and will stick their noses into the air over any food they haven’t already tried or their friends haven’t convinced them to try.
Lastly…YAY for no TV. We gave up cable when my son was 1 and have never regretted it. When my kids were young their Christmas and birthday lists had what they honestly wanted and were interested in…not whatever the most advertised toy was.
Kirsten says
I love reading your posts – you have an old soul. I’m sure you’ve been told that before! 🙂 I was so happy to get my hands on Addie on Saturday – what a sweetheart! I have to get my baby fixes when and where I can! And congrats to your hubs, that is a wonderful accomplishment…especially in RI!