She was being three. Running around the front of the grocery cart and giggling. “Peek-a-boo!” she jeered through the bars at her sister. She sure is spirited, the woman behind me sneered. Her teenager was rolling her eyes at her iPhone, looks like you’ve got a spirited one yourself, I offered back.
Silence.
For the first time, I didn’t allow someone’s comments to make me shrink into myself.
And I never would again.
I’m a rather tough mom. I don’t cave easily. I often remind my darling threenager to settle down, mind her hands, keep her voice down- all at appropriate times. And when she upsets patrons in certain situations, I apologize, but I don’t need to apologize for her age. Three year olds are, by nature, spirited, and the words, “I’m sorry, she’s three,” keep happening to me. I find them spilling from my lips, falling on unwilling listeners. They do not want an apology, they want some Colonial Times version of children. They prefer them seen and not heard… all while they talk loudly into cell phones, snap gum in their mouths, and lay hands on their own.
I will not apologize for her age anymore. I will not say I’m sorry for her laughter, even when it is a bit loud. Or her clapping her hands at her sister’s delight. I will not take the joy of hearing the innocence of childhood spill from my children in line at the grocery store. And in return, I vow to not show up at a restaurant at 9pm on a Friday night with my kids and hope to not spoil your evening. I will not bring my babies into the Fine China section of any department stores. But when we are in public, and Addie is being three, I will not be sorry anymore.
I won’t apologize for her being her anymore. Let them be three. #aisforadelaide
— Chelley Martinka (@martinkadelux) October 25, 2015
We are family, and family sticks together, minding our own and tending their young minds to shape them into adults. I am shaping these minds to be active and creative. To test some boundaries, because what is life if not something we push to change and improve?
This is the day I stop apologizing to you, and looking inward to us.
Let them be three.
I LOVE this! I’m not ok with children acting badly in public and by that I mean running into a fine china department and smashing plates (multiple) on the floor while the parents ignore them, or writing their names and drawing on the floor of Bath and Body Works with bottles of bubble bath, again, while Mom ignores them (yes, I have seen both of those things happen), but kids being kids with the joy that goes along? LOVE it! Seeing 2 young siblings play and giggle? Heartwarming! You are the best Mom!
<3
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
You make some great points, at age 3 I remember there were things that we couldn’t help, there were part of the toddler mundane. It is what it is, if people cant accept, forget about it.
NORAH recently posted…Remembering Loved Ones During Breast Cancer Awareness Month
Amen!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
What a cool post! I love your story at the beginning! You are SO right – and she’s a lucky little girl to have such a great mom!
Jeni Hawkins recently posted…Personalized Photo Magnet (great stocking stuffer) only $1.99 Shipped + More Photo Deals
Thank you!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
Your girls are so lucky to have you. We should never apologize for our kids 🙂
Truth!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
That is super awesome of you, WTG! Never apologize for your child expressing herself, especially with such joy.
While I’m conscious that everyone has a story, and that mom might have been having a really bad day, maybe with her own daughter, it’s really sad that she felt the need to spread that hurt to others. :/
Aeryn Lynne recently posted…A True Ghost Story: The Mole Hill
EXACTLY! I always try to smile when I see people who may be struggling. You never know their silent battle.
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
I love that phrase “let them be three”! Can I still apply it to myself and act like I’m three?!?!
Scott recently posted…A Perfect Game for Those That Never Win
Why not, Scott? I think people should all just be able to be themselves.
I AGREE! Be three!!!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
I say let kids be kids. They are only little once!
Amber Nelson recently posted…Best Fall Romance Movies to Watch on a Cold Fall Day
YES!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
I think this is a great plan.
Cindy (Prime Beauty) recently posted…Comment on DIY Bath Bombs! by Brooke @ Blushing Noir
🙂
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
I don’t apologize my children being their age. If they get a little crazy, I choose to either pick them up and cuddle or leave. That’s it. But that’s between me and them, not others.
April Grant recently posted…The #Minions Have Invaded! (Minion Inspired Birthday Party on the Cheap)
I need to learn this- thank you!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
Kids are kids and it’s fine. People who don’t understand are immune to their natural charm and would rather not understand. I hope that makes sense. I let my girls be themselves so long as we’re not bothering people.
I think some people look to be bothered and then complain. It’s kind of strange.
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
Good for you! My son is 3 – almost 4 and I feel like I should apologize for him just being a boy.
chastity recently posted…“let’s nap outside bro!” ~ Carson
Never!!!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
That’s the right attitude. You never should say sorry when your kids are having fun. It’s normal and all kids do that. So long as they are not hurting or disturbing other people, it’s alright.
Ourfamilyworld recently posted…New Releases on Netflix for Kids in November 2015
So true!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
I don’t think a child’s innocence and natural exuberance needs to be apologized before. It’s a shame to shut that down!
Liz Mays recently posted…Get Your Discover Card Apple Pay Connected!
I am definitely learning that!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
This is the great post and i enjoyed reading it. I learn a new things and i will apply it to my two boys
<3
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
Great post… we never should say sorry for their age. I am a proud mom 🙂
rika recently posted…Slow Cooker Meatballs Recipe – Celebrating the Magic in Mealtime
So true!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
What a fabulous post. My son is two and I also find myself apologising when really he’s just acting his age and not bothering anyone at all. Great post and thank you so much for sharing.
Gotta let them be kids! I am SO sick of the idea that kids need to act like adults when they’re just babies!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
Totally agree. I used to be the same especially when we used to do grocery shopping but now I realized that this is how three year olds are.
Shaney Vijendranath recently posted…To My Husband, now that I’m a Mom…
Let them be three!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
I love this post. You are an awesome mom. We should never apologize for our kids.
Mykidsguide recently posted…16 Songs To Kick-Start Your November
<3
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
Very touching story, yes you should never apologize on her age, we’re so lucky to have our daughter.
Nikki recently posted…7 Delicious Ways to Use Bertolli® Pasta Sauce in Your Family Recipes #BertolliTuscanTour
Being a parent is such a blessing, for sure!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
This is a wonderful post. You most definitely should not apologize for the normal behavior of a little one!
Maureen recently posted…Organic Cough Relief with Maty’s
I am definitely learning that!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
This is so inspiring as fellow mom of a threenager! I love it – I hope I can be as bold as you are!
Kelly @ Texas Type A Mom recently posted…Charlie Brown Popcorn Recipe
You got this!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
I think it is so important to let kids be kids. In these modern times, they are growing up too fast as it is.
Toughcookiemommy recently posted…Beauty Regimen For Busy Moms
EXACTLY!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game
I’ve been apologizing for my son laughing too loud, being excited talking and SINGING in the shower, while we are guests in a family member’s home. I recognized it and I stopped. I’m not going to making him feel bad or uncertain of how to act, because someone else doesn’t think his awesome is awesome. I totally get and love this post. 🙂
AWESOME for sure!! I love the singing. I realized we were getting stared at in church today… then the looks turned to smiles. I was all AMEN inside!
Chelley @ A is for Adelaide recently posted…Find The Right Size Confidence and Get Back in the Game