This is a Gift

I wrote about this on Facebook, but it wasn’t enough. Almost, but not quite. I wanted to share it again because so many friends reached out to tell me they’d forgotten about how important they were. So… I’ll start at the beginning of the day:

I had a day this week, one where Addie was recovering from a nasty stomach bug, and we were shelling out thousands of dollars for a new roof, and I just had the time to sit and think and do all the things around the house that one suddenly sees need doing when there is a dumpster blocking their car in the driveway and the kids are too lethargic to leave anyway.

 

Recovery from a belly bug never looked so beautiful. . . . . . #aisforadelaide #daughter #beautifulgirl #peace #snuggles #perfection #love #family #innocence #childhood #healthy #restday #aisforadelaideblog

A post shared by Chelley M. (@martinkadeluxe) on Apr 12, 2017 at 12:27pm PDT

And so, as I folded the last of the sheets, towels, and t-shirts, I thought. I walked from room to room, enjoying my energy, despite the sickness in the house, despite the banging atop my house. I felt a bounce in my step- a true joy beaming from my feet through the floor. And then I glanced into the living room, where the kids were perched on top of every blanket and pillow they could find, having a pretend picnic using the tiniest, squeaky voices. And there it was. The girls seem like they’re growing up right before my eyes- I leave the room for a few minutes and come back to them enjoying a new discovery… a word, a trick, a story.

And in that reflection, I took the time to look back on my life for the past 5 years.

Somewhere in between getting pregnant and losing that baby to being blessed with Addie and then Millie, I lost giving back to me wholly and lovingly.
I feared what would happen to the kids if I wasn't there. Click To Tweet
What would happen to my marriage if I wasn’t always there. What would life be like for the people I love if I stopped doing something for them and, instead, did something for me?

So I slowly tested the waters. I started to figure out what I needed to be eating to feel better… and the energy I gained was amazing.
And my family joined me.
So I started to workout right in my living room. And the empowerment I felt was epic.
And my family cheered me.
So I started to ask friends to take this journey with me. And the community was fulfilling.
And my family flourished.
So I started to train for races- a part of me I dearly missed. And my soul felt peaceful.
And my family celebrated.

And I felt like this:

And no one lost their shit.
No one suffered.
My family loves to work out with me.
We love to try new recipes and make fancy shakes on the weekends.
They can’t wait to see me at races… a game of I Spy Mommy!

 

I’ve worked hard… my abs are defined, my arms are strong, my legs like trees and my sweat pouring like the ocean. I’ve also birthed 2 children, been pregnant 3 times, and survived abuse. I wasn’t always kind to it, but this body is my own. I have learned to love it, care for it, and enjoy all of its personality… and yes, Millie is digging her heel in for support on my extra skin. #glamorous . . . . . . #T25 #beachbody #cardio #strong #aisforadelaide #camillethea #strong #motherhood #workout #noexcuses #myjourney #weightloss #coachlife #weightlossjourney #nevergiveup #workinprogress #health #wellnesscoach #fitfriends #fitfam #fitness #fitlife #fitspo #fitmom #bossbabe #supersetregimen #lifebydesign #aisforadelaideblog

A post shared by Chelley M. (@martinkadeluxe) on Mar 21, 2017 at 7:29am PDT

And so those few moments here and there that I miss, those have made us closer. Happier. Healthier.

And they’re growing up right before my eyes… and I get to be there for it, enjoying it. Not sidelined by anxiety about how I feel, or my lack of energy, or how I look.

And that is a gift I want to share.