We’ve only ever gotten good news… or at least never bad news… but recently Addie has seemed like she has back pain. I hope it’s nothing, and just that when people push too hard on her back, she doesn’t like it- instead of it actually hurting. Either way, we are getting ready to go.
In my pink bag I have everything. Every x-ray, blood test, doctor’s note (from every doctor), clinic sheet from Early Intervention, denial letter from insurance, bill I’ve paid out, and all of my own research into Achondroplasia. It’s all neatly organized and labeled in the tote bag I carry from doctor-to-doctor. It looks harmless, but weighing in at about 14 pounds, this bag, a Clinique freebie (Thanks, C!), holds all that is my child’s diagnosis.
Bringing this bag with me, armed with a notebook for my own use, I have never forgotten to ask a question, had to get back to a doctor, nurse, patient adviser, financial board or customer service representative with that information. I have it all in front of me, prepared for whatever is going to be said or done. Just in case.
I feel like there have been times in life where I’ve been ridiculed for my over-preparedness, but I know first hand that life can surprise you. And not all surprises are good. Some change your life, some alter your path, some enlighten and enrich, and others leave you bitter, grasping at straws to answer why. I don’t want to be the why. In fact, I want to prevent the why as much as possible.